Author Topic: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider  (Read 9306 times)

ScooterWolf

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Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« on: October 08, 2010, 07:42:35 PM »
The following is not true, but simply provided for your entertainment -  ;)

______________________________________________________________

My wife slapped me in face - hard! Problem was, I had no idea why. All right ... maybe I did.

It all started earlier in the evening. I was riding back home on my scooter, Fall night, cool weather, 9:00 pm with clouds threatening rain in about an hour. That's when I saw her pulled over to the side of the road, hood up on a new import. Her hips stuck out in jeans the color of the night, with a pale face illuminated by her headlights. Her platinum blonde hair practically glowed.

Blondes. They always seem to get me into trouble, but I pull over anyway.

There's some trepidation on her face as she watches me swing off the bike until I remove my full face helmet. I guess my face said I was the trusting type and she relaxed her defenses. I'm a tall Black guy, 6' 1", and clean shaven -- hey, it's the age of Obama. I'm rewarded with a beaming smile. She's cute and certainly doesn't need all the make-up she's wearing, but I see she's close to tears and I can only imagine how worse she'd look once her mascara begins to run, or the coming rain hits her. 

The car's a complete loss. The engine had seized up and there was no way it was going to start. Worse, none of us can get any bars on our cells so I offer to give her a ride to a service station about five miles down the road.

Her trepidation returns, but I promise to drive slow. She relents, especially when I insist she wear my helmet. After a few quick passenger instructions we're on our way and arrive at the station about ten minutes later (hey, I said I'd go slow). I hang around enough to make sure she's helped and on her way back with the tow truck driver.

She thanks me again, shaking my hand like it's pump and hands back my helmet. I watch her go. Maybe blondes aren't so much trouble after all. I strap on my helmet, jump on my bike and make it back home twenty minutes later, just barely beating the rain.

My wife greets me, relieved that I'm safe since I'm unusually late. I decide not to mention the blonde and chalk it up to traffic with a shrug. That's when I removed my helmet and she looks at me in open shock.

She slapped me in the face - hard. I touched my cheek, feeling a stinging redness as she marched upstairs to bed. Looks like I was sleeping on the couch tonight. Damn.

Wish I knew why?

_______________________

Not the greatest mystery, but anyone know why our rider got slapped?




wordslinger

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #1 on: October 08, 2010, 09:49:35 PM »
...could be that smear of make-up, or that platinum blonde hair the girl left in your helmet...


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oswaldters

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #2 on: October 08, 2010, 09:49:48 PM »
Blonde hair from the helmet is my guess.

I hope I'm wrong since I don't want to do the next mystery....

Rianna

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #3 on: October 09, 2010, 02:11:16 AM »
Okay, so, if you lived in a small town I'd say that someone had already called and tipped off your wife about seeing you at the gas station with some blonde they didn't recognize before you ever got home and lied...um fibbed...um...omitted a truth.

oswaldters

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #4 on: October 09, 2010, 02:14:16 AM »
or that platinum blonde hair the girl left in your helmet...

Man, Word beat me to it by 13 seconds...

Rianna

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #5 on: October 09, 2010, 02:15:09 AM »
I know, he's fast, right? Some nights I can't keep up. lol

wordslinger

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #6 on: October 09, 2010, 02:15:16 AM »
..im quick on th' draw os...

 ;)

..lmao...
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wordslinger

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #7 on: October 09, 2010, 02:15:58 AM »
and lied...um fibbed...um...omitted a truth.

..what color's your hair??

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oswaldters

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #8 on: October 09, 2010, 02:16:58 AM »
You know your blondes.

wordslinger

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #9 on: October 09, 2010, 02:17:49 AM »
..i reckon...lol..

..i was married to one for 11 years...

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Rianna

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #10 on: October 09, 2010, 02:18:48 AM »
Lol...that's all women's though, ain't it?

wordslinger

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #11 on: October 09, 2010, 02:21:47 AM »
..no, ain't no two women the same..

..not in my experience anyways....

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oswaldters

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #12 on: October 09, 2010, 02:21:55 AM »
So the moral of the story is make 'em ride without a helmet?

wordslinger

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #13 on: October 09, 2010, 02:23:05 AM »
...and wipe off all that danged make-up!!!!
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oswaldters

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Re: Mystery Scooter Theater 2010 - Case of the Helpful Rider
« Reply #14 on: October 09, 2010, 02:24:51 AM »
or avoid women who use that much makeup...

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