OK, so here's where I'm at.
I tried the Carb cleaner in the vent, but no luck. I added some Heet to the tank and swished it around for a bit, emptied the Carb of whatever fluids were still inside through the little drain tube, tried again but still no luck. Took out the spark plug which was a little greasy, wiped it off best I could, tried again but still no.
I'm also killing my two batteries with all this attempted starting which brings me to another question.
I *did* happen to buy that battery tender that was recommended at the same time I bought the new battery, however when I hook either battery up to it it gives me a green light no matter what which according to the charger is the "storage" light. It never goes red to 'charging' although I know very well at least one of the batteries is nearing death. The old battery has trouble with even one startup attempt and the display dims when I try, so I know its got practically nothing. Anyone know why the charger doesn't go to charging, or is the green light indicitive of the trickle charge in action?
Anyway, not quite sure where to go from here except to have someone who knows more look at it. Thanks for the suggestions all!